The Midnight Writer is a freelance writer and contributor to popular websites and magazines. He's written three humor books and often writes while under the influence. Under the influence of what, he will not say.
The Midnight Writer
Pockets Are For Squares — Carry Cash in the Cash Capsule
Wallets are for granddad and kids with a Velcro obsession. Real men use money clips or just fold their dough into their front pants pocket. These are the normal, yet not always safe, options.
Watch This Clearly Insane Fella Smash Another Driver’s Windshield With His Fist
This video might be good reason for everyone to get a dashboard cam.
One-Handed Basketball Player is Better Than Half His Two-Handed Opponents
Zach Hodskins, a 6'2 Junior for Milton High School in Georgia, was born with just one arm. That didn't stop him from becoming an insanely good basketball player. His highlight reel shows he can do just about anything on the court.
This makes us feel awful about our athletic ability...
‘Where’s Waldo’ Hat from Urban Outfitters Will Make Strangers Stare at Your Head
Need a reason for complete strangers to stare at your head, point, and yell "I think I see him!"? Then you, my friend, have issues.
Beyonce Bought Jay-Z a $5M Watch For His Birthday Because She’s Sasha Fierce Gifter
Beyonce bought Jay-Z a $5M watch for his birthday, but don't worry, you're pack of homemade IOU coupons is still totally a neat gift idea.
The Day a Donut Almost Killed Me — Half a Man
Individually, the interns were all pretty nice guys. A little juvenile, sure, but tolerable for the most part. Put them all at a conference table in a professional setting, though, and it was like assembling lazy intern Voltron -- Each khaki-panted part sliding onto the next to create one massive jerk...
Watch This BMW Execute the Worst Parking Job Ever
We'll admit that parking spots are getting smaller in most parking lots but this driver is parking her BMW like she's trying to fit a submarine into a kid's pool.
Chronic Gamer Girl Will Make You Hungry for Retro Video Games, Possibly Oreos
Are you looking for a video with junk food, video games, terrible Australian accents, internet cheat codes, reading, more accents, hernias, Zelda, chocolate, Webster, veggie chips, Ron Paul, pickles, cursing at a TV screen and casual cannabis usage...
Urban Shredder From Hot Wheels Sure to Be on Most Dangerous Toy List this Holiday
The Urban Shredder from Hot Wheels looks like every kid's moist dream and every parent's biggest nightmare.
‘Greek Elvis’ Left Rare Lamborghini In a Hotel Parking Lot For Thirty Years
It must be nice to be so filthy rich that a gifted Lamborghini Miura S can just rot in a parking garage for thirty years and, eh, no big deal. It must also be cool to be 'Greek Elvis' but let's focus on the car.